tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8367051921026110661.post5428554719155778578..comments2023-06-23T06:38:13.093-07:00Comments on The Secret Pepper Society: Adoptive Child SyndromeSECRET PEPPER PERSON:http://www.blogger.com/profile/06434583043459305729noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8367051921026110661.post-85572607851551153022011-08-30T13:11:48.476-07:002011-08-30T13:11:48.476-07:00I had no idea. Do you think it makes any differen...I had no idea. Do you think it makes any difference if the kids are from other cultures?<br /><br />I have a couple of friends and an acquaintance who've adopted, two children each, only one of them with a child children now approaching the teen years. The friends adopted toddlers from China. Both couples were older and thrilled to start families.<br /><br />This post was scary coming from you.Kathleen Scotthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10868566314392048880noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8367051921026110661.post-90915257132304833872011-08-29T15:41:37.937-07:002011-08-29T15:41:37.937-07:00Oh yeah!! This description is mark on to most of ...Oh yeah!! This description is mark on to most of my adopted children and it seems to have made zero difference the ages they were. Two of the adoptees were 9 mos. at foster care placement - one is a sociopath in training (he's 17 now) and the other is 7 and the smartest, most astute child you've ever set your eyes on. One was a newborn and she struggles with mental illness and general teenage angst (ie selfishness) but seems to be attached at age 16. Another was 2 and she seems to be the worst off so far. She's now 18, we thought she was attached, apparently wasn't and her mental illnesses kicked in full force 2 yrs ago. She is lost to us right now. Two others (sibs) were 3 and 4 and while they have varying levels of attachment to our family, they have a very strange attachment to one another that is hard to describe (not truly unhealthy, but it could head in that direction if we weren't there to correct them OFTEN). So, my point is, there probably needs to be some kind of program for adoptees, that adoptive parents can access when the need arises, that deals with loss and attachment and all of those other things we take for granted but seem to cut us off at the needs when the behavioral issues emerge. Thanks for this info - I personally think I need to be as informed as possible when fighting this battle.Lisahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14612523674452864077noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8367051921026110661.post-23778959772177336812011-08-28T15:13:25.173-07:002011-08-28T15:13:25.173-07:00Lilith: I totally agree with your two bits as it i...Lilith: I totally agree with your two bits as it is absolute truth. Prenatal addictions, traumas, poor nutrition....you can't erase the damages by providing a "forever family." The residual effects are the only thing "forever." The rest is a crap shoot. Sometimes you win. Sometimes you lose.SECRET PEPPER PERSON:https://www.blogger.com/profile/06434583043459305729noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8367051921026110661.post-62224778864677287482011-08-28T07:03:38.402-07:002011-08-28T07:03:38.402-07:00There is a very good book written by a doctor in V...There is a very good book written by a doctor in Vancouver, Gabor Maté called "In The Realm of Hungry Ghosts". It's not about adoptions but about addictions but it does address the effects of pre and post natal stress on the developing fetus and baby. The stress alters the baby's brain forever, leading to problems such as depression and addictions. <br /><br />It is my belief that this is part of the problem with adoptions, pre natal stress. I would imagine many babies given up for adoption come from mothers that struggle with addictions, poverty, depression as well as a multitude of other problems. <br /><br />I chose not to give up my son for adoption but I think the stress I was under while pregnant and after his birth affected him negatively. <br /><br />Anyway, that's my two bits.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8367051921026110661.post-59910459685878158622011-08-27T05:53:04.768-07:002011-08-27T05:53:04.768-07:00I think I understand comletely.I may have been cra...I think I understand comletely.I may have been crazy to start with if not and I am going there now its going to be a very short trip. Got to leave the train is pulling out of the station.B.D.D.W.noreply@blogger.com